Most of the current holiday traditions of our country have roots that go deep into the past. So it is with a wedding. All the most exciting and impressive: the proposal, the pre-wedding festivities and the marriage process itself - all these wedding customs have been inherited from our ancestors. And that's what makes the process work. What has been invented in our days, unfortunately, cannot boast of the brightness and unforgettableness of the event. And even sadder is the fact that not all the traditions of the ancestors have survived to this day.

How is it happening today?

In fact, what are modern Russian wedding ceremonies?

Let's outline briefly. A young man proposes to his chosen one, in most cases relegating events such as "ask the bride's parents for her hand" and "receiving a parent's blessing" into the background. And it happens that he does not resort to such actions at all.

After the bride accepts the groom's proposal, active calculations begin, how much this celebration will cost. An application is submitted to the registry office, which allows you to determine the exact date of the wedding. The bride, resorting to the help of her bridesmaids, chooses her wedding dress, jewelry and shoes. The responsible person, the toastmaster, is responsible for the wedding script itself. Usually she is not related to either the side of the groom or the side of the bride.

Immediately before the wedding, events such as stag and hen parties take place.

And finally, that day comes - the wedding. With or without a visit to the church, young people in their motorcade arrive at the doors of the registry office, where the main wedding ceremony takes place. And only after the signature of both parties, the marriage is considered valid.

How was it before?

Initially, there was no single Russian people, but only various tribes of pagans. Each of them had their own cultural customs. Naturally, the wedding ceremonies of these tribes differed from each other. Among the meadows there was a special reverence for marriage bonds. They welcomed harmony in the home and were anxious to create a new family in their community. What cannot be said, for example, about the Drevlyans. They were dominated by a barbaric attitude to this issue. Wedding rites and customs seemed alien to them. And for a man of such a tribe, it was not considered shameful to steal a girl he liked. Moreover, she could be both from a foreign tribe, and from her own.

Over time, the tribes converged and rallied. Thus, uniting their cultures into one single.

The pagan ancient wedding ceremony consisted of dancing near idols. So our ancestors revered their gods, thereby consolidating the marriage. The dances were accompanied by mass dousing with water, jumping over the fire and singing ritual songs.

Significant changes were brought with it by the baptism of Rus'. Thus, paganism and Christianity are closely intertwined. No matter how the church tried to eradicate manifestations of paganism, nothing came of it. To this day, elements of it are present in our traditions.

However, with the advent of Christianity, it became obligatory to go to church on the wedding day. Thus, marriage was considered sanctified. Otherwise, everything was as before - a feast that dragged on for up to seven days, dancing and sleigh rides.

What time was considered appropriate for the wedding?

As in our days, they tried to carry out ancient wedding ceremonies at a certain time of the year. Most often this was done in autumn and winter, since during this period there was no need to engage in agricultural work. In case of special need (for example, an unplanned pregnancy of the bride), the wedding was played in the spring or summer. But this was extremely rare.

Despite this, there were not so many days for the celebration. Wedding customs forbade weddings:

During fasting;

During Christmas time;

In Easter Week;

On Maslenitsa;

On Orthodox holidays.

It was also not customary to marry in May.

Religious and magical actions during the wedding

Wedding ceremonies in Rus' were famous for their superstition, which again is a considerable merit of paganism. And it was believed that the time of the wedding is the right moment for evil spirits. To protect the young from its effects, many rituals were performed. Thus, the newlyweds were protected from the evil influence of spirits, as well as from damage and the evil eye.

Witnesses, who were the friends of the young, were needed in order to confuse the evil spirits. So, according to the beliefs of the ancestors, evil spirits could not find real future spouses, which prevented her from fulfilling her dirty plans. In addition to the fact that friends and relatives of the young people participated in the withdrawal of evil forces, various amulets were also used for this. For example, the bride's veil served as a kind of protection from dark spirits. When they moved on a sleigh, they deliberately swept the road after themselves, which was also supposed to throw the evil forces off the trail.

Carrying out all the above measures, relatives and friends provided the spouses with a happy marriage, prosperity and health. If the wedding took place with people who had previously been widowed, then little attention was paid to such traditions.

When and how did you prepare for the wedding?

On the part of the bride, preparations for a future wedding began almost from her very childhood. She was taught to cook, sew and other household chores.

In addition, there was a tradition that for the wedding, the bride was obliged to sew a towel for each relative from the groom's side. The very same future spouse was intended for a shirt woven by the hands of the bride. A piece of material for a sundress and a scarf for the head were intended for the groom's mother.

Who made the choice?

As a rule, the choice fell entirely on the shoulders of the parents of the young. Matchmaking, bride and collusion also took place under their control.

If the children themselves chose their own mate, then this was considered disrespectful to the parents, and such marriages were considered unhappy. However, there were cases when parents approved of their child's choice.

Young people could meet in the squares, where mass celebrations often took place. The girls sang and danced. The guys played musical instruments (harp and balalaika), and also arranged horseback riding, where they demonstrated their dexterity and courage in front of the fair sex.

Dowry

Dowry was the property that was attached with the bride after the wedding. Basically, these were furniture, women's clothing and jewelry, money (exclusively silver and gold), as well as livestock and real estate. It was welcomed that the girl was from a wealthy family. If the family did not have a dowry, then it was provided by the groom's side.

Matchmaking

Wedding ceremonies in Rus' differed in that this action took place without the participation of the young. This event was usually planned for Sunday or some other holiday. The groom's parents took with them an attorney - a matchmaker. It was she who was to represent the interests of the young man before the side of the bride. She praised the groom in every possible way and discussed the dowry with the bride's parents. At the end, the matchmaker took both sides by the hands and led them around the table three times, after which they were baptized in front of the icons. Leaving, the father of the groom appointed the date of the bride. As a rule, they took place a week after the matchmaking.

Smotriny

A week before the bride, the groom's side carefully prepared for this event. Sleighs were decorated, clothes were sewn and gifts were prepared.

In the bride's house, everything was even more reverent. The future wife had to personally clean the room where the guests would gather. The best robes were taken out and treats were prepared.

Wedding ceremonies in Rus' did not allow the groom to participate in the bride. The bride was examined by his parents. Her main task was to impress a modest girl.

After the bride-to-be came to an end, the groom's side went out into the courtyard for a meeting. This was already a formality, since the final decision was made after the matchmaking.

Collusion

This important point included every wedding ceremony in ancient Rus'. The conspiracy was accompanied by a more magnificent feast than matchmaking and the bride. And during it, both parties signed an agreement. Thus, our ancestors got engaged. The contract spelled out the exact date of the wedding. And after the signatures were put, the only reason that could violate the marriage ceremony was the death of one of the young.

After the contract was signed, the sister (or girlfriend) of the bride entered the room and presented gifts to each relative from the groom's side.

Wedding

Before the adoption of Christianity, pagan weddings consisted in the departure of the young from the village. Surrounded by their peers (there should not have been elders), they went to the edge of the forest. There they wove wreaths, sang ritual songs and danced round dances. It was believed that, in this way, nature itself blesses the young.

When the pagan wedding rites were supplanted by the Orthodox Church, it became obligatory to enter into an alliance in the temple.

Before the wedding day, the bride and her bridesmaids had a bachelorette party. They washed in the bath, sang songs and wondered about what fate awaits the girl in married life.

On the day of the wedding, at first everyone gathered in the groom's house and feasted. Various rituals were held, controlled by the matchmaker. In general, the entire scenario of the wedding belonged to her. After the third course was served, the young and the guests went to the temple.

In the temple, the father blessed the marriage, and the father handed over her daughter, now, to her husband. At the same time, he hit his daughter with a whip, which meant a parental order to obey and honor her husband. The whip was passed on to her husband. Sometimes it was limited to this, but there is evidence that some wedding ceremonies in Rus' were carried out by whipping the future wife by her husband. Striking her with a whip three times, according to legend, the husband made his wife submissive.

After a long ceremony in the church, everyone returned back to the groom's house. The rest of the festivities were spent there. Russian wedding ceremonies, as a rule, took place in three days.

At night, the young were escorted to their box and no longer disturbed. Starting from the second day of the festivities, they could easily wake up in the middle of the night, dress and return to the table.

The bride's nightgown was checked for deprivation of virginity. If there were no such spots, then the wedding could be broken, and the girl ridiculed. The stains on the shirt were shown to the guests at the table, which served as a good indicator for the bride.

Where can such traditions be found today?

There are few places where such wedding traditions are still preserved. However, in our country there are still lands where people, although not completely, have preserved the old customs. So, for example, the wedding ceremony in the Kuban is quite reminiscent of a wedding that was once held in Rus'. The Cossacks have always been famous for honoring the history and traditions of their people, thereby preserving its heritage for their descendants.

Most wedding traditions are based on ancient wedding rites that have come down to us from pagan times that existed many centuries ago, then they had a certain meaning. Of course, the wedding today and then in Rus' are very different from each other. Rites and traditions have passed from past centuries to the present day in a modern and simplified form, partially losing their original meaning.

It was forbidden to hold a wedding on certain dates, for example, on fasting, during Christmas time, on Easter.

Often the choice of the bride and groom was made by the parents of the young. But it happened that parents approved their own choice of their children.

The bride's parents prepared for their daughter, that is, the property that the bride will take with her after the wedding to a new home. It could be furniture, clothing and jewelry, and even livestock.

Important attention was paid to the wedding night of the young, after the first day they were escorted to their box and not disturbed. In the morning, relatives could check if there were stains on the sheets or the bride's shirt, which indicated the honesty of the girl.

Previously, the sequence of wedding and previous actions and ceremonies was as follows: the groom's relatives to the bride, the engagement, and such an unusual stage as “howling”.

For the bride and her bridesmaids, they arranged for the groom and his friends. Particular attention was paid to the redemption of the bride by the groom from her relatives, then the young were married. Then the young and the guests walked and went to the celebration.

Even after the adoption of Christianity, the Slavs remained quite superstitious, and this was reflected in the rituals. The main thing was to protect the young from the evil eye and damage.

Marriage and betrothal

In its modern form, the matchmaking process is in most cases skipped, considered optional, symbolic.

And before, not a single wedding could do without it, the rite was called “handshaking”. The bridegroom came to the bride's house with friends and relatives, they praised the groom and asked for the girl's hand.

On this day, we agreed on when the wedding would take place, discussed the details and calculated the finances.

For the first time, the young people were called the bride and groom in front of everyone, and the guy gave the girl a ring and other gifts.

Parents blessed the young, gave parting words for a happy and long life together. They arranged a small feast, where, in addition to relatives, witnesses of the matchmaking ceremony were present.

"Vytiye" and a bachelorette party

After the young were engaged, it began. The bride, at that time, was supposed not to leave the house, but to lament and cry over her life in her parents' house, since after the wedding she passed into the groom's family in a new status.

Friends and relatives of the bride came to the bachelorette party. They also cried and untwisted the bride's braid, which meant that she was moving into a different status, becoming the wife of her husband, a woman.

Groom's bachelor party

In the old days, the bachelor party was called "youth party". As a rule, it took place at the groom's house in the form of a feast, during which there was a farewell to single life and friends. Having had fun, the groom and relatives went to visit the bride with gifts and good mood.

Bride ransom

Previously, at the ransom, before the groom arrived for the bride, they swept the road to the house very well so that the young would not come across a stone or an object with a slander along the way.

First, the groom with friends and relatives bought the way to the house, then the door to the house and the bride's room, then the future wife herself. With this rite of redemption, both the spirits and relatives of the bride were coaxed, as it were, for a happy later life.

In order for the family to have prosperity and well-being, after the ransom and before entering the church, the young people were sprinkled with millet or hops.

Wedding

The wedding ceremony is an old Christian ceremony in the process of a Russian wedding. There was a custom that the bride and groom were taken to church by different roads, to ward off the evil eye, or, for example, such a superstition that the parents were not present at the wedding ceremony.

Under the feet of young husbands and wives, they laid, and are laying now, a handkerchief and sprinkled with trifles so that their life would be prosperous.

At the end of the ceremony, the bride and groom simultaneously extinguished the wedding candles, which were then kept until the very birth.

Previously, in the church at the wedding, they also beat the dishes so that they could live happily, part of this sign has survived to this day. But now the dishes are no longer beaten in the church.

After the wedding ceremony, the girlfriends braided two braids for the young wife, put them in a hairstyle around the head and put on a warrior, this headdress was worn by married women.

In modern weddings, this ceremony has evolved into a process where the bride's veil is removed from her head, which also marks the transition to married life.

walk

This ancient tradition has survived to this day. Young people before the celebration in the restaurant ride around the city in parks, memorable and beautiful places.

In the old days, it was a tradition after the wedding of the bride and groom to take them along a tangled road to the house of a new husband.

And it was not customary for the bride to cross the threshold herself, her husband carried her in his arms in order to deceive the evil forces and avoid the bride stumbling, this was considered a very bad omen.

As today, the young parents were greeted with bread and salt, and the bride and groom bit off a piece of loaf, which was then broken over their heads.

In the future, the family had to keep this bread all their lives, as a symbol of family prosperity.

In addition to prosperity, the young people wished for more children, and for this purpose they put the young on an animal skin.

Traditions of the wedding feast

Walked and celebrated the wedding for several days. The first day - in the groom's house, the second - in the bride's house, the third day they again walked with the groom.

According to tradition, on the first day of the festivities, the young couple did not eat anything. And after the first day, the ritual of “laying down” the young took place, which meant healthy offspring.

On the second and third days, checks were arranged for the young wife, for example, it was necessary to light the stove, cook something, sweep.

We are accustomed to imagine a Russian folk wedding as many days of unbridled fun: the guests famously drink, have a good snack, dance until they drop, sing until they are hoarse, and then fight with rapture.
But in reality, these festivities are only the second part of the folk wedding ritual, once called the “red table”.

The first part of it - the "black table" - is almost completely forgotten.

In ancient times, according to the rules of the "black table", the bride had to go to the ceremony of consecrating the family union not in a festive dress, as is often shown in films, but in mourning attire, as if to a funeral.

Yes, this was her ritual funeral, and in the eyes of those accompanying the betrothed was none other than the living dead.
Rudiments of these ideas could be found in Russian villages as early as the beginning of the 20th century.
And now their shadows sometimes appear among the carefree wedding fun.
According to tradition, after a home engagement, the bride immediately put on mourning: in some areas, white shirts and sundresses (white is the color of snow and death among the Slavs), in others - black (influence of the Christian idea of ​​\u200b\u200bgrief).

In the Arkhangelsk province, in general, the head of the bride was covered with a cockle, in which they were usually buried.
After that, it was time for the girl to perform the rite of lamentation for her fate.
The bride mourned herself as a dead man: in the Novgorod region, for example, people still sing about the shroud, which she wants to receive as a gift.
Often a girl in tears turned to the cuckoo with a request to convey the news to her parents.
This is also not accidental: the cuckoo was considered a bird that flew freely between the two worlds.

In many countries, it was forbidden for brides to speak, laugh, go out, and sometimes even sit down at a common table.
They are dead, they can’t do anything except dowry, and that’s only because, according to popular beliefs, women’s souls in the other world are allowed to spin and sew.
The very word "bride" means "unknown" (from "not to know"), that is, impersonal, like all the dead.
For brides, they also sewed special shirts with sleeves below the tassels so that they would not touch people and things - the touch of a dead man could be fatal.

Finally, the traditional veil, which later transformed into a veil, was originally a means to hide the bride's look, which was once perceived as the same as a witch's.

In this context, the original meaning of the custom of arranging a bath for the bride on the eve of the wedding becomes clear. This is nothing but ablution before the funeral.
In the Karelian villages, the newlywed was even laid after that, like a dead man, in a red corner under the images.

The groom belonged to the world of the living.
Accordingly, his task was to go to the world of the dead, find his bride there and bring her back to life, making her a woman.
The very parting of the groom with his parents and relatives before leaving for the bride reproduces the speech of a man lying on his deathbed.
Arriving at the bride, the young man found that her friends did not let him into the house.

In the Nizhny Novgorod province, the “guards” directly stated that a dead man was lying in the house.
The only way to get there is to pay a ransom for gates, doors, stairs, etc.

Friends who do not want to let the bride go act here as her afterlife companions.
Equally dressed, they demanded from the groom that he guessed among them his betrothed, in other words, removed from her a deadly facelessness.
It was necessary to guess up to three times, if all attempts were unsuccessful, it was considered a bad omen - the marriage would not be strong.

But the groom did not come to the bride alone either, he had a friend (the main manager of the married relatives of the groom) and a thousand (the godfather of the groom) with him.
Without them, the living in the world of the dead is very vulnerable, because it risks meeting much more insidious inhabitants of the other world than the bridesmaids.
Tysyatsky was the holder of the wedding treasury and redeemed everything that was due according to the rite.
And the friend wielded a whip, whipping them crosswise, scaring away demons.
He could help the groom look for the bride.
A special towel was tied over his shoulder - a towel embroidered in red.

It was a symbol of the way to another world: on the towels they lowered the coffin into the grave, and sometimes even laid it on the deceased.
After the blessing of the bride's parents, the wedding train was arranged.
The bride rode with her matchmaker and in some cases lay down on her knees, portraying the deceased.
In her hands was a broom - a talisman against evil spirits, so that she would not keep her from returning to the world of the living.

In the Kostroma and Rostov provinces, the wedding train stopped at the cemetery on the way, so that the spirits of the ancestors would not be offended that they were being taken away from them that once belonged to them.

But all the precautions were taken, the bride was redeemed, the rite of consecration of the family union was performed, and she was brought to the groom's house.

Here, all the participants in the wedding were sprinkled with well water, and the carts drove through the laid out fire: it was supposed to be cleansed after communicating with the world of the dead.
The same rite, by the way, was observed in the homelands, and at funerals.
In the house of her husband, the bride put on a white shirt with colorful embroidery and a festive red poneva (skirt).
The girl's braid was untwisted, and a kichka, a headdress of married women, was put on her head.

After the young people were escorted to the bedroom.
The next morning, a newly born person appeared before the guests, and in ancient times this was understood literally: the one who became a wife changed not only her surname (family name), but also her personal name.
This metamorphosis was "officially" fixed the next day through the ritual of searching for the bridegroom's relatives in the house of her parents: there was a man - and not.
For the same purpose, the search for the deceased was also carried out.
So the ritual point was put.

Rituals and customs in Rus'

WEDDING RITE.

Wedding ceremonies in Rus' evolved over the centuries. Every word, every gesture of the rite had a symbolic meaning. So, the marriage ceremony was preceded by betrothal in front of witnesses. It was accompanied by the ceremony of joining the hands of the bride and groom and giving the groom a ring to the bride.

This ring served not only to adorn the bride, but also as a symbol of the fact that the whole household was now entrusted to her care. All documents were fastened with a stone set in a ring.

The basis of the Russian wedding was ritual games: matchmaking, bridegroom, conspiracy, bachelorette party, wedding and others.

All these rituals were accompanied by lyrical, laudatory, playful songs. In all wedding rituals, the bride and groom - the prince and princess, the swan and the swan - were put forward in the first place.

The wedding feast lasted 3-4 days.
Nowhere was the triumph of healers so glorified as in rural weddings. A prosperous family life, eternal strife, illness, home-cooked meals - everything depends on the healers. Starting a wedding, they went to the healer with big gifts, bows, with requests - to protect the young from wedding ruin. The medicine man was the first guest at the wedding: he is the first to be called, he owns the first glass of green wine, they bake a pie for him, send gifts.

Wedding litter consists in the observance of many rituals for the future well-being of the “prince and princess”. The medicine man inspects all corners, thresholds, reads slander, gives slanderous water to drink, blows on the tablecloth, sweeps the ceiling, puts the key under the threshold, drives black dogs out of the yard, inspects the brooms, smokes the bathhouse, sprinkles food, goes to the forest for elderberry and hands the matchmaker a branch nine-grain pod. On the third day, the healer takes the matchmaker with him to the bath, and here the promises are calculated. If he gets persuaded, then this branch is burned.

In ancient times in Rus', weddings were celebrated widely and cheerfully, there were many guests, and the customs were carried out by all participants in the celebration so neatly and clearly that the wedding ceremony lasted several days.

Our ancestors did not puzzle over where to find a good toastmaster and what competitions to come up with - they had a whole arsenal of signs and rituals that could not be ignored in any case.

Fortunately for the future spouses, they gave chickens, poured rice on the threshold and put a barn lock under the rug.

Some of these customs have survived to this day, and some just want to be revived.

1. Give newlyweds birds

The custom of giving a couple of geese in wedding ribbons came to Rus' from the Lithuanians. In ancient times, these geese were then roasted, and the young ate them on the first day. To avoid confusion on the part of the guests, you can replace live geese with fried ones, or bake a wedding cake in the form of a pair of geese.

2. Druzhki instead of toastmaster

Friends are very important people at a wedding. The current witnesses, of course, are inferior to them. There should be two friends, they are obliged to help the young people prepare for the wedding, keep the crowns at the wedding, and entertain the guests. Friends are often a good substitute for toastmaster. Boyfriends are selected from among the unmarried friends of the groom, but for a modern wedding it is not so important whether the boyfriend is married or not, and whose friend he is - the groom or the bride. Surely, you have a couple of fun-loving friends who would fit the role of friends.

3. Shower the newlyweds with hops and coins

Upon leaving the church (who is not getting married, from the registry office), the young were showered with hop and flax seeds for happiness. At princely weddings, handfuls of coins were thrown. Coins are perhaps the best option for shedding “happiness”, because this is a Russian custom, unlike throwing rice that came to us from India, and besides, rice gets stuck behind the collar and in the folds of clothes, which is not very convenient.

4. Drink beer at the bride price

Druzhka with the groom comes for the bride to redeem her. In general, the custom of drinking beer refers to matchmaking, and not to the wedding itself, but since in our time there is no matchmaking as such, you can do it on the day of the wedding.
The bridesmaids and the bridesmaid from her side make riddles, the groom for each correct answer approaches the threshold of the bride's house, for each incorrect one he drinks a sip of beer. After all, beer is not vodka, so even if the groom, who is not thinking well from excitement and happiness, answers all the questions incorrectly, he is unlikely to get very tipsy.

5. The bride washes the groom, and the groom gives her bread

After the ransom, the bride, as a sign of her readiness to serve her husband and be devoted to him, washes her father-in-law from a jug, then the mother-in-law and the groom himself. And the groom gives bread to his betrothed as a sign that he will be able to feed his family. The bride herself bites off the bread, then the mother-in-law and father-in-law.

6. Matchmaking

Matchmaking is a ritual when the groom's matchmakers found out what kind of bride she is and how much dowry she has. In fact, it was a preliminary wedding agreement. Often, matchmakers not only went to find out details about the bride and negotiate a wedding, but they themselves looked for the right candidate for the groom. According to tradition, the matchmakers did not speak directly about the purpose of the visit, but used allegories. The bride's parents pretended not to understand what they were talking about and did not immediately agree to marry their daughter.

7. Bridging

Some time after the matchmaking, the bride's parents went to the bridegroom's bride. They examined not only the groom, but also the house and household, in order to know where and in what conditions their daughter would live. After the inspection, a rich feast followed, followed by the day of the bride's bride.

Bridesmaid visits were organized to find out if she was beautiful, to find out what she could do around the house, how much dowry she had. If everything suited, the future father-in-law kissed the girl on both cheeks, and the groom drank to the bottom a glass of honey drink brought by the bride's mother.

8. Handshake

This rite has practically not reached our days. It consisted in the fact that the parents of the young discussed the financial affairs of the upcoming marriage, found out who would pay for the wedding, and decided where the newlyweds would live. All negotiations ended with a handshake (hitting hands) and an exchange of gifts.

After this ritual, the groom finally met the bride in public to exchange rings with her. There was an engagement.

9. Foods with meaning

A loaf was being prepared for the wedding, so that the young would taste it as a sign of unity. Also, according to tradition, fried chicken was presented to the bride and groom as a gift. This served as a symbol of the fact that now the newlyweds will share all the food for two.

10. Initiation of the bride into a married woman

The matchmaker removed the girl's wreath from the bride, twisted her hair and put on a female headdress - a kiku, over which a veil was thrown. Giving the daughter to the groom, the father lightly hit her with a whip so that her husband obeyed, then he passed the whip to her husband.

11. Vytiye

This is a ritual cry that takes place in the bride's house. This rite is needed in order to show that the girl lived well in her parents' house, but after the wedding she will have to leave her father's house. Vytiye is a tearful farewell of the bride to her parents, friends and will.

12. Bachelorette

It is both an ancient and modern wedding ceremony. However, before the bachelorette party was celebrated a little differently than now. Girlfriends came to the girl to help sew gifts for the groom and his close relatives, and at the same time the girls sang wedding songs. Sometimes the groom and his friends could also come there and together they began to drink tea and arrange various youth games. At the same time, the bride spent all her time before the wedding in howls and tears, as she said goodbye to her girlish life. Another important moment that was sure to be performed in the old days is the bathing of the bride in the bath the day before the wedding.

13. Redemption of the bride by the groom on the wedding day

Before the ransom, the young bride said goodbye to her parents' house, to her parents and to her friends. The bridesmaids did not want to give their girlfriend away just like that and demanded a ransom from the groom. On the very day of the wedding, both the groom and the bride must dress in everything new. By the way, it is interesting to note that earlier they did not just ransom, and sometimes they even staged symbolic battles between the bride’s relatives and the groom’s relatives. After some symbolic resistance, the bride's relatives gave up and handed her over to the groom.

14. Wedding

Now this ceremony is not considered obligatory, but those young people who are sure that they will be with each other forever, and who are ready to bind themselves to each other before God, perform this wedding ceremony according to all the rules of the church.

15. Call the proud

Previously, the bride's parents did not come to the wedding feast on the first day, and behind them were sent disguised guests, who were supposed to invite the bride's parents in a cheerful uniform to the feast. This rite was called "to call the proud."

There are many different wedding traditions: both ancient and modern, each couple chooses what she likes best and what young people and their parents consider more correct, interesting and important.

Original entry and comments on

Since ancient times, the Russian wedding has been one of the brightest and most unique rituals of the culture of Rus'.
Ancient chronicles, on the other hand, say that there were no common Slavic wedding traditions as such, customs were different among different tribes.
So, for example, the meadows were more respectful of marriage ties, considered them sacred, and spouses were charged with the duty of mutual respect, maintaining peace in the family.
Other tribes, such as the Drevlyans, the northerners simply kidnapped the girls they liked, including from other tribes, and without performing any rituals began to live with them.
Polygamy was also not uncommon in those days.

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wedding ceremonies

Gradually, the religion and life of the ancient Slavs became more complicated, more and more new deities and traditions appeared, new rites were borrowed. In general, over time, mores became softer, primitive savagery gave way to civility, albeit peculiar. The kidnapping of the bride is still preserved, but it has become more of a rite, which, as a rule, took place by agreement of the parties.

Most wedding traditions, such as throwing rice or breaking a wedding cake, go back a long way.

Wedding traditions are divided into several stages. These are pre-wedding customs, which include acquaintance, the bride's bride. Then, in wedding traditions, pre-wedding preparations can be distinguished: matchmaking, bachelorette party. Then traditionally there are wedding ceremonies - the ransom of the bride, the wedding, the wedding festivities. But apart from these wedding traditions, we can also recall more "ancient" customs. So, for example, a very interesting wedding tradition is to pass on an engagement ring from generation to generation: from mother to daughter or from father to son. In addition, wedding traditions depend on the area and category of the population. But there is a commonality of wedding traditions and wedding ceremonies of different peoples.

Every nation has many wedding traditions, rituals and signs, because marriage is one of the most important moments in life.

In the past, young people got married very early.

A single life, judging by the proverbs, did not represent much charm:

Not married - not a man

Single - half a person,

God help the unmarried, and the mistress will help the married,

The family is at war, and the lonely one is grieving,

Not the one who is happy with her father, but the one who is happy with her husband,

With him grief, and without him - twice.

How were the old weddings in ancient Rus'

Before going to church, the bride and groom were put on fur. Matchmakers combed their hair, wetting the comb in wine or strong honey. Then they were showered with hops or grain with money, after which the marriage candles were lit with an Epiphany candle.

Until the 18th century, that is, before the innovations of Peter the Great, the old wedding customs were observed by everyone, including the upper strata of society. Since the 18th century the folk rite begins to be supplanted in high society by the all-European "polites".

The old pre-revolutionary rite consisted of three main cycles: pre-wedding, wedding and post-wedding, which was the same for all classes. With the strictest observance of customs, the first cycle included matchmaking, inspection of the house, a bachelorette and bachelor party, ritual washing of the bride and groom in a bath (before the wedding).

The second cycle - the collection of the wedding train, the arrival of the groom for the bride, the meeting of the young parents in the house, the bringing of the dowry, the ceremonies after the wedding night, etc. The wedding feast occupied the central place.

The third, final, cycle included "retractions" - visits by young people to their closest relatives.

The wedding ceremony was the same for almost every Russian - from the grand dukes to the last subject. Otherwise, the marriage rites of Rus' differed for each class. The variety of rituals and superstitions made a village wedding different from a city one, a noble one from a merchant wedding, etc. They were united by one thing - each set of rituals was aimed at ensuring harmony, wealth and offspring in the family.

Matchmaking in Rus'

Previously, it was customary to marry in Rus' early. Often the newlyweds were no more than 13 years old. The groom's parents chose the bride, and young people could find out about the wedding when preparations for it were already in full swing.

In our time, for the most part, families are formed out of mutual love, and the right of choice belongs to young people entering into marriage, therefore, matchmaking, as in the old days, with matchmakers, dowry agreements, a deposit and other conditions, now practically does not exist. But even now, according to the rules of etiquette, a young man must come to the bride's house and ask her parents to marry the girl to him. And this is already a tribute to the traditions of Rus' - in fact, the groom does not ask for permission, but a kind of approval of their union.

Collusion

According to an old tradition, after the matchmaking, an agreement follows. The parties agreed on the costs of the wedding, on gifts, dowry, and the like. All this took place in the bride's house, where a meal was prepared.

Bachelorette and bachelor party

On the eve of the wedding, the bride always invited her friends to visit. They went to the bathhouse, washed themselves, and then combed their hair. It was customary to depict the groom and the future family life of the bride in black colors, as this symbolized both the bride's farewell to her friends and the girl's life, and a talisman against damage.

The bachelor party is a rather late tradition. The old Russian bridegroom went to the bath alone, and the custom ordered him, on the contrary, to be silent. But gradually the bachelor party also became a tradition.

ransom

The morning of the wedding day used to begin with the lamentations of the bride and the performance of various rituals from the evil eye in the groom's house, and when the groom and the matchmakers came for the bride, a fun ceremony of redemption began, which many newlyweds love to this day. Girlfriends ask the groom and his assistant-witness difficult questions, make riddles, or simply say:

We won't give up, we'll help out! Let's drive it out or let them give a ransom.

The groom must answer all the questions, solve riddles and give the bridesmaids money or sweets.

Sometimes bridesmaids simply hide the bride's wedding shoes and demand a ransom for them too.

feast

Previously, at the entrance of the newlyweds, a mother always met, who sprinkled her son and daughter-in-law with oats and millet - for a charm and wealth. Then the parents had to cheer the newlyweds with bread and salt. In ancient times, the parents themselves baked bread. The custom of breaking off or cutting off pieces of bread to tell fortunes has survived to this day. Previously, they guessed at children - who would be born first, a boy or a girl, and how young people would manage their income.

Wedding night in ancient Rus'

The wedding day ended with seeing off the young to rest, usually to the bathhouse, to the hayloft or even to the barn. This was done in order to keep the place of their first bedchamber secret and to protect them from the evil eye and evil slander.

That is why even now many couples sometimes unconsciously strive to spend their wedding night not at home - in a luxury hotel, on a yacht, or simply in a new apartment where there is no one else.

Previously, the husband took his wife in his arms and brought him into the house in order to deceive the brownie: supposedly the wife is not a stranger from another kind, but a born baby.